Mi Piel

I've been following Richie(linecook)'s blog since I started blogger, partially because it's an entertaining read, but for the most part because his blog is a window into the world that I've wanted to be a part of for as long as I can remember - the restaurant kitchen. I started cooking fairly young, and by age 9, shouldered the bulk of the responsibility for feeding my brothers and sisters. My mom had a busy schedule, and that coupled with what seemed like a desire to be anywhere than home with her kids, left us on our own a lot. Most of my meals were rudimentary at best, but spending hours in that kitchen, poring over cookbooks and trying to teach myself how to make my food worth eating instilled a passion for cooking in me that stays with me to this day.

Cooking became how I showed my affection for people. Even long after my mother kicked me out, I'd go pick up my siblings and bring them home with me for roast beef and mash. When a friend was recovering from a very traumatic event and I finally got her to talk to me on the phone, I told her, "Don't go anywhere, I'm coming over, and I'm bringing tortilla soup." And I did. She didn't talk about it, and I didn't press her - we just sat together at her dining table at midnight, eating my soup. I got closer to who would become my husband over chile' verde, and cooking helped me feel like I had a place in my new family. I couldn't imagine my life without the little bits of knowledge I've picked up over the years, and it thrills me to think there is still so much that I don't know that's out there - waiting to be learned.

I spoke to a woman that works with my husband that has her culinary arts degree, and spent years in the kitchen a week or so ago - he told her that I was interested in her line of work, and I asked her if she thought culinary school was the best course of action. Her answer surprised me.. She said, "Don't waste your money. Find a fine dining restaurant that you really like, and ask for a job washing dishes. Do anything and everything they ask you to do, and if you prove that you're reliable and you want to be there, you'll work your way up. But you have to be willing to do the stuff that no one else wants to, and do it well." She went on to tell me how so many kids graduated from culinary school and expected to be hired on straightaway as a sous chef, or an executive chef, and how unrealistic and ridiculous it was.

Anyway, I said all that to say this - I listened to the 2nd podcast that Richie posted today, and it was almost verbatim what she'd said. Amy was talking about sitting down with yourself to find out if cooking was what you really wanted to do.. part of her advice (paraphrased) was to ask yourself if you were okay with knowing that there was so much more to learn about cooking and not doing anything about it.

I'm not.

I identify with their desire to cook- I don't cook because I want to, I cook because I have to, because if I don't it feels like I'm missing a limb.

Next big project - finding a way to make it work.